Earlier this week I watched the trailer to Tessa Thompson’s new film, Sylvie’s Love. The film follows Tessa Thompson’s character, a young Black woman who has dreams of working in television and finds a job working as an Assistant Producer.
This job is not generally one given to a married woman, much less a Black Woman and it follows Sylvie, the titular character, as she attempts to live her dreams and struggles with her love life. In a scene, Sylvie’s dreams come into conflict with her husband, who wants her to be the perfect wife, so she tells him:
I can’t be the woman of your dreams while also trying to be the woman of my dreams.
This quote, I would argue, coincides with what the last two episodes of Menajerima Ara. In the seventh episode of Menajerima Ara we see Dicle giving up on her dream in order to make Kıraç’s life easier. As Dicle herself puts it, she is willing to risk her dreams to make Kıraç’s life easier, and yet he would not do the same for her.
Dicle’s Dream : 7. Bölüm
The seventh episode of Menajerima Ara was perhaps the most difficult to watch, and it largely has to do with the fact that Dicle gives up is giving up her dreams. She is hurt by her father, hurt by Barış choosing Beren over her, and hurt by Feris for not fighting to keep her at the agency.
Yet, as the seventh episode unfolds we watch Dicle come to terms that her selflessness, though it is a great strength, is also causing her problems. We see Dicle establish boundaries and not compromise on her dreams. Firstly, she turns down Barış offers to be his assistant. As Dicle puts it her decision to turn down Barış’s offer didn’t come from a place of hating Barış, but rather because she wants to follow her dreams and establish herself in the sector.
The other moment that we see Dicle establish healthy boundaries comes from her decision to stay working at Ego Agency. This is a choice that Dicle makes because she realises that Kıraç would rather allow Mayda to believe that he and Dicle are having an affair than admit that Dicle is his daughter. While she was willing to give up on her dreams, Kıraç was not okay with being uncomfortable. Resigning and taking Barış’s job offer would be the selfless thing to do, however, we see Dicle grow and establish boundaries and think about herself to live her dreams.
Women & Compromise : 8. Bölüm
This idea of being the woman of one’s dream is carried to the next episode and is made prominent by the various women of the 8th episode.
The entire episode focuses on the various women who exist in different areas of life who are all trying to live their dreams. There’s Dicle, who’s trying to establish herself in the sector, and Feris who is a very prominent manager who knows her place, and finally Burçin Terzioğlu who is a super famous actress. All of these women have different moments in the episode where they are put into a position where they are expected to compromise.
For Feris, this comes through her work. Though Feris loves her work she feels like she needs to sacrifice it to be in a relationship with Nejat. She believes this so firmly that she thinks that Nejat would for her sure break up with her after her outburst at the restaurant when she tells him that she priorities her work. However, at the end of the episode, we see Nejat accept this aspect of
Through Burçin Terzioğlu we see a different form of compromise, a compromise that would allow violence against women to continue to exist. As you can see from this powerful speech, women are expected to not speak up, to compromise their voices, which would allow the countless incidents of female violence to continue to exist. Though I hate to say it, it would have made sense if Burçin had compromised her voice to stay on good terms with the sponsor, because that is a thing that is so commonplace. However, she chose to speak up and not be silenced.
Lastly, we have the Dicle. As previously established, in the last episode we saw the fallout of Dicle compromising her dreams for men, and realising that she is not something that she is willing to do that. At the end of that episode, we also see Dicle promise herself that she won’t let the sector change her and make her heartless. We see the outcome of those decisions throughout the episode. On one hand, Dicle chooses to stay working at Ego Agency, yet she chose to be kind to Kıraç by not outing him as her father to Mayda.
We also see Dicle establish better boundaries in her relationship with Barış by not willing to compromise her dreams to be in a relationship with him. She confesses that she did want something romantic to happen between them, however, because she is hurt by his decision to engage in a relationship with Beren. She makes it known that she wants to focus on her work and establish himself in the industry and Barış accepts that decision.
Like Mother, Like Daughter
On a side note, I would like to add that this is probably why Beren, Gülin, Mayda are such unlikeable female characters. We see Dicle, Feris, and even Jülide struggle to establish themselves in the industry and follow their dreams. While all the other women are attempting to live their dreams Beren and Mayda’s are making decisions as a result of the men in their life. Mayda only bought the Agency as a result of her falling out with Kıraç and Beren’s whole life revolves around being close to Barış.
As Barış and many others have pointed out, Beren’s relationship with Barış is superficial seeing she doesn’t listen to him. She has an idealised picture of their relationship and their connection seems very dependent on their work and their lives as celebrities. In the scene where Beren makes him dinner, she gets distracted from this cooking because she is afraid of what could be happening between Barış and Dicle. As we see from Kıraç’s outburst, she risked her job and the quality of her cooking to spy on them, which is almost directly the opposite of what Dicle does this episode when she decides to not risk her career for Barış.
Barış’s Journey
In comparison, Barış is going on a completely different journey. I know that within the fandom there is much debate about Barış as a character and the decisions that he makes… But if you have read my blog post, you know that I believe that his decisions make sense and he is not “bipolar”.
Let me say that again for the people in the back, Barış is not bipolar, so stop labelling him as such.
I would argue that the quote that explains Barış’s actions and character arc is Dicle mother’s “Motherly Advice”.
Dicle’s mother advises to Dicle to not to find someone who she loves, but rather someone who loves her. Someone who will love and appreciate her and who will carry her in their arms. Someone who won’t leave her behind in the same way that Kıraç left them.
I know, I know, your thinking Erica, this is absurd advice when it comes to Barış. Barış is so selfish, he only thinks of himself. He has repeatedly thought about himself, completely disregarding Dicle’s (and even Beren’s) feelings. He says so himself in the club scene from the episode 7, he sometimes is insensitive and uncaring.
A Relationship Built on Lies (Not Really, But Still) : 7. Bölüm
However, before we start talking about Barış we need to establish something of Dicle and Barış’s relationship: it is one that is uneven and filled with miscommunication and misunderstanding.
Dicle entered the relationship expecting something romantic to grow out of it. Barış on the other hand, though he is attracted to Dicle, seems to see her more as a form of comfort. This all comes to head when Barış asks Dicle to stay the night, which changes their relationship, adding so much miscommunication. Their decision to forget about the night and move on is since Barış took Dicle not staying the night to mean she wasn’t interested in him, and Dicle took him saying that he was drunk and wanted to forget about the night to mean the same thing. However, neither character spoke to the other about their intentions and read meaning into the actions of the other without the other saying it explicitly.
Another huge area of unevenness in their relationship comes from how they see each other. There is another aspect to their uneven relationship that comes from Dicle side. While Barış may feel like Dicle is the only person that he can be himself around, Dicle does not feel that way because she is hiding her feelings from him, as well as her secret about her father. Dicle is unable to be herself around Barış.
Yet, another area of complete miscommunication comes from the way that Barış sees Dicle. We know that he sees her as the only person in his life that understands him. This could explain him saying “I don’t want another, I want you” remark, especially because he has pushed away his brother and by his admission, Beren doesn’t understand him. However, in the club scene, we see more of this miscommunication. Barış laments the fact that he is being “insensitive and selfish” towards others (which is what caused Beren to be upset at the club), however, he tells Dicle that she would never do something like this.
Through this, we see an example of Menajerima Ara subverting tropes. When I suggested that my friend watch the dizi she explained that though she was enjoying the dizi, she found it made her anxious especially in regards to Dicle and Barış’s relationship.
She explained how she hated the status difference between Dicle and Barış and explained how exhausting she would find it if the drama revolved around Dicle not feeling good enough for Barış because of his fame. This is a common trope in stories where a celebrity falls for a normal person. Another common trope is that the normal person might have a romantised version of the celebrity that doesn’t reflect reality. Yet, in Menajerima Ara it is Barış who feels like he is inferior to Dicle and puts Dicle on a pedestal. He has a very idealised idea of Dicle, thinking that she is completely selfless.
In Dicle and Barış last interactions in the 7th episode, we see Barış’s insensitive nature furthered when he offers Dicle a job as his assistant. We see Barış impulsive nature through this offer and Dicle rightly turns down the offer leaving a confused Barış at the sidewalk. Later in the episode, Barış goes and apologies to Dicle for making the offer and she explains her reasoning.
Barış Havas and a Journey of Growth : 8. Bölüm
In the 8th Bölüm, we see Barış is going on his journey and many of the scenes in this episode parallel ones that have come before in previous episodes and show Barış’s growth.
The most obvious example comes from the scene where Barış is trying on clothes, which is a direct parallel to their first encounter, a thing that Barış brings up.
How it started. How is going
Originally tweeted by selo shelby (@gigiibebe) on October 10, 2020.
On one hand, I love this call back because it’s so cute and I love Dicle and Barış together. I think there is another element to it because as @heviwillnot, points out, the scene where Dicle is helping Barış with his clothes is such a call back to their relationship earlier where they laughed, joked, and there was warmth between them before all of the drama in episode occurred.
Dicle notices that Barış has been calling her by her name, instead of “Assistant Kiz”. While this may seem like a tiny step (and it is) it shows growth on Barış’s part it is a direct call back to the previous episode where Barış sees Dicle exclusively as an Assistant Girl without taking into consideration her dreams or desires. Here, however, we finally see Barış accept Dicle as she is. We see him further prioritise Dicle feelings by asking her if there is something wrong.
The other important scene that occurs comes when Beren tries to cook Barış’s favourite meal. This is Beren’s attempt to romance Barış, and it backfires and is lowkey the stuff of horror movies and a complete waste of food.
However, the Barış we see in this scene is the complete opposite of the Barış in the previous episode. In the previous episode, we see Barış go to the club, think insensitively about his words to Beren, and allows her to stay the night. We see him listen to the fans, his producers, and even Dicle who have all pushed him towards being in a relationship with Beren.
In this episode Barış makes it clear that though he will eat dinner with Beren he doesn’t want to go to the club nor does he want her to come back to his house with him. He is establishing some boundaries in their relationship and distancing himself from Beren. Much like Dicle, he is choosing to prioritise his work (reading his script) instead of focusing on relationships. Ultimately Barış does get distracted by a relationship just not his relationship with Beren, but with Dicle.
Originally tweeted by alara (@saudadeshipper) on October 16, 2020.
All of this leads to the final scene of the episode where Dicle tells Barış that she just wants them to remain friends with him and nothing more. While I understand that some might be upset by this decision, when it comes to the overall theme of the episode and Barış’s character arc, his decision to remain friends with her is important.
Firstly, we get a parallel to the scene where Barış tells Dicle that he wants to forget about the night that he asked her to stay over and just remain friends with her.
Most importantly though by having Barış accept Dicle request to remain, friends, we see him follow through with both Dicle’s mother and Burçin Terzioğl’s speeches. Burçin Terzioğl speech was about the importance of the women’s voices, Dicle mother’s advice was about the importance of finding a man who would prioritise Dicle. By listening to Dicle request to stay friends, Barış is prioritising Dicle, her voice, and her dreams, regardless of how it impacts his feelings. He is finally sacrificing for her and not thinking about himself.
However, throughout this episode we see something else occurring between Dicle and Barış clearer communication. Barış sees Dicle not think and say whatever was on her mind about Burçin Terzioğl dress. We also see better communication. Dicle tells Barış that she wants to be friends with him, not due to some hidden expectation she had of him, but due to her desires. She lays it out as it is and they are both on the same level as each other.
Furthermore, from the synopsis and fragman of the next episode, it seems like Barış might learn about Dicle’s secret, which would create even more clarity between them.
Additional Thoughts/Questions:
- I absouletly adore the way that the guest stars were integrated into the eighth episode. If you are unaware, Filmekimi and Istanbul Film Festival, two of the biggest film festivals in Turkey, were happening when the 8 Bölüm aired. Having Burçin Terzioğlu be preparing to present at the Istanbul Film Festival is very topical and shows the writers ability to integrate the very real aspects of the film sector in this very fictional show. The other guest star is Hazal Kaya, who much like the episode depicts, has recently signed on to be the ambassador of Cif Türkiye.
- I really need Barış to admit his feelings for Dicle make a move. Up until this point, he has been a bit passive in their relationship… Additionally, if we are robbed of Dicle and Barış scenes because of the new dude… I will riot!
- Lastly, I need Barış and Dicle to hug.
ERICA TALKS SH*T 